It’s raining. I normally like rain. However, this week it seems like a fitting end to a depressing time. It has nothing to do with my diet and exercise. I got to the gym Monday through Saturday and had both of my scheduled training sessions. I tried to eat more salads and baked chicken during the work week. The weekend hasn’t been as successful, but also not disastrous.
It didn’t help that Wednesday was the third anniversary of my mom’s passing. That is the kind of thing that you see coming and think about after it has passed. I’m still thinking about it. I also still feel weird (as I mentioned a couple of posts ago) – like I’m on the verge of a change, but I don’t know what it is. I catch myself looking at real estate listings (using the fact that my son is house hunting as an excuse), and searching resume sites; and job postings. I don’t know what I want, and I’m not even sure I’d know it if I found it. This is just a vaguely dissatisfying time.
Sometimes I think writing something (other than this blog) would help. Then I can’t think of anything and I just feel worse. As much as I’d like to write fiction, I’m afraid my mind is just too analytical and factually oriented, which is weird. I don’t like reading non-fiction, but it seems to be all I can write. Maybe this all boils down to being in my 60’s and never having accomplished anything that really makes a difference. I like having goals, but I’m realizing that the older we get the harder it is to meet those goals.
The presidential race isn’t helping. The lunacy rolls on! This week’s big story line has been the violence at Trump rallies. I cannot support Trump, but I also wish the protesters at his rallies would just sit and hold their signs and wear their shirts and not yell things. When they get rowdy they give Trump’s security people an excuse (at least in their minds) to get rough with them. Kind of like baiting them. I wonder if the protesters realize that what they are doing just cements the opinions of those who are at those rallies to support Trump. I wonder what the protesters think they are doing? Anyone who supports Trump is not going to change his or her mind just because protesters show up at rallies. Those who have made their decision will not be swayed – regardless of the candidate.
Personally, I think everyone involved – the protesters and the Trump supporters alike – participates in these displays of idiocy because they think they may get on television through the news media. I observed the same thing starting in Ferguson, MO and snaking through all the different locations where various movements protested law enforcement. Everyone protesting was playing to the camera – especially the well known attorneys. It’s all just more of the same.
The primary season has very little to do with me. Delaware’s primaries are not open, and since I am an Independent I do not vote in any primaries. However, once the final presidential candidates are selected at the conventions this summer, I am exactly the type of voter those running should be after. A voter who has an open mind and has not committed to any party. A voter who is willing to listen, respectfully, to intelligent discourse and weigh all the information available prior to making a decision. For me, the only exception to this is Trump. I simply cannot vote for someone who talks like a schoolyard bully and reminds me of a toddler.
Until next week….